I'm not 21 anymore

April 3rd, 2008 by under Uncategorized. No Comments.

One of the things that I have realized over the past couple of weeks is that even though I am back in school I’m not 21 anymore. Thank god for the most part. I’m glad that I know more now and do not act so irresponsible and immature, however it also means I can no longer go out every night of the week. Even every other night of the week is tough. I like my sleep. I like feeling good when I wake up in the morning and not like death. I also don’t recover as quickly as I use to so the feeling of death lasts a lot longer then it use to. Even though I know this and I have been experiencing it a lot lately it doesn’t stop me when making my decision on what to do with my evening. I just keep telling myself that school is going to be ending soon and many of these people I will never see again so this is my chance. It is also the last opportunity I have to act however I want. There is a limited level of responsibility right now, and while the demands on my time are high, I can still make the decision on what I want to do and what I don’t want to do. Since I do not see my social patterns changing in the near future I just need to figure out a new way to deal with it so that I am not perpetually exhausted. I’m sure there is a point in everyone’s life when they come to this realization, so it might not just be school it is probably also the age I am at. Whatever the case may be these past two weeks have really extenuated the point for me.

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